6|9|02 - it's friday 23:07 local time, i'm doing this for myself, to clear up my mind, to hide my feelings, to get away from the truth...
You can have friends without knowing it, and at the same time make enemies with your past.
I live by the fact that everybody changes, nobody's the same and everything that's real can blow up in your face because the truth that you imagined was a life-livin'-lie.
the dresscode of people here in amsterdam is difficult, because you can be judged by it. it's like everything is all about the outside, the way you walk, the way you talk, but in your mind you know who you are and just realise that you don't want to be that person.
i am not like that, i already accepted the fact that i am who i am and not gonna live my life like some player in a game, i've chosen to be myself, the way that i am. some might think i'm strange, maybe even fun, all i can say is that i am an individual and no-one can take that part of me, i'm just being me...
now i can ask you questions like, 'why do you hate me?' or 'why do you care?' the only answer i could think of is life ain't fair... or is it the people. if you do mind your own buesiness but keep an eye on me, cause when i fall, it's going to be a long fall and by the time that happens.. catch me..
Those are the true friends.. but i'm not mad and i won't tell a secret if i have to and maybe not even tell it because i just don't do, cause every secret is save by me.. i'll just shut up.
some friends are the best friends, you can trust them, you know you can count on them, they know who you are and they'll always try to protect you.
I don't have many friends like these but the ones i have, you know i have your back covered, back-protection men!
you might read this all.. so i'm asking you are you angry? do you think you know me? do you want to know me?
well, just check it.. My name is Reda Haouam, born 16|06 , it all turned out wrong.. that date is cursed.. i'm telling ya, when it's june the 16th, just look outside, look what's happening, search for a smile, cause i'm not giving you one.. is it cursed?
i'm tired maybe, maybe only my eyes, my mind, just this.. maybe the words don't come out so good, maybe you even think i'm evil, i'm not.. so i wanna say..
i'm sorry men for all the things i've done.. without even knowing i did it to you.. i'm sorry for the things i've said, couldn't find the right words and after that regret.. the things i've heard and maybe tell, without knowing the fact i couldn't yell.. i'm just saying sorry for everythings that's bad because of me and made you mad, the things i've done that clearly were wrong.. but don't hate me for the things i did not knew cause if your wrong all i can say is fok joe..!
love & respekt is everything, but do i really think so? yes i do, is you love me you should respekt me, and don't critizise me all the way. Cause if you love me you supose to trust me, and should try to listen to whatever i say.. when i don't live up the rules i made up myself, i could say whatever i want and end up with to black eyes sitting in a wheelchair playing basket with one arm.. so do i believe what i'm saying all the time again and again, yes i do.. love and respekt is everything..
you see this page is black and white, some people see the world just like this. i'm not talking about the gray area, i'm talkin bout colors. they hear somthing like a rumour (black) and they believe it (white) and then they start thinking like what if? and so if that's the case he/she might be like that.. and suddenly they make up stories without knowing they making people look bad.
i don't say a thing unless it's true, if i don't know for sure i just say that it could be and not that it is, i don't make any conclusions about any- or somebody i know or don't know.. two guys walkin hand in hand, might be a gay but could be two friends, but not makin conclusion but say the one that's obvious just for fun of something, look gays! like that..
even when you don't like me try not to hate me.. it's now 23:51 just wanna say good night and remember this love and respekt is everything...!
One Luv to My homes Michael (iNdo-Bro)...thnx for helping clear my mind!!!! Reda aka Yo' Lil' MoCrO InDoOP